Where in your life do you feel powerful? Why?
This question was hard for me to answer directly. I had to look at it from the corner of my eye, like a faint star.
First, how do we define power? When I feel powerful, am I truly? Or is it only my perception? You may view me in the moment as controlling or manipulative while I see myself as doing an excellent job. How do we know? It seems to depend on several factors.
Someone like (sorry to use his name) Trump, is powerful. We may not like to admit that, but he can ruin lives with his words. That power seems to me to be gained through manipulation. Smoke and mirrors. But, as long as everyone continues to tell him he’s wearing clothes, it becomes more than illusion. Whereas, if everyone refused to give him that power, he’d lose it because it’s not really there at all.
Real power, the kind that feeds and sustains over time rather than destroying, seems to me to require competence and confidence.
I’m also not sure you can have power (not based on manipulation) unless there is trust. I think someone has to give you the power. If you take the power, it’s not ever truly yours, and maybe that’s what makes people like that so angry and fearful.
“The more you tighten your grip, the more star systems will slip through your fingers.” I always loved that line.
I think people who take power have to create adversaries. Their form of power requires it. Are you passively taking this role somewhere in your life?
I don’t have answers. I just found this question to be one that I’d never truly looked at deeply, and I feel kind of old to only be addressing now. I think I would have done a few things differently in relationships and at work if I’d examined this earlier. I guess we’re always learning & growing. I’d love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to share in the comments or link your blog.